It is not as difficult for you to pick up women as you might think. The most effective way for you to pick up women is to man up and forget your doubts. Below is a tried and true action plan.
Before the Approach: Gauging Potential Success
Before approaching a woman, pay attention to what she is doing. Look for visual cues in order to determine your potential level of success. From a distance, try to establish eye contact. Does she hold your gaze? Is she smiling? Those are promising signs. Is she avoiding your gaze? Is she talking to her friends or is she looking around at men in the room? If she is looking around the room, there is a higher chance of her being receptive.
Openers: Making the First Impression
Once you have decided that your intended target will be receptive, it is time to approach her with your pickup artist opener — also known as a PUA opener.
There are several types of PUA openers. The opinion opener is a very low-pressure way to ease into a dialogue.
You could say, “My buddy and I were just talking about something and we need a female perspective. Did you know that the average American woman is 5′4″ and wears a size 14?”
If you want to project more confidence, use a direct opener. Keep yourself out of the friend zone by saying something like, “You really are stunning. I had to come over here to meet you.” This displays high-level confidence and takes the woman’s guesswork out of the equation. She does not need to ask herself, “Is he interested?”
If she is with friends, never express interest in them. If you hit on more than one woman in the same group, your intended target will not feel special. Also, do not be afraid to compliment her, even if you think that she has heard it all before. By being genuine, you will make yourself stand out from every other guy who has approached her.
Body Language: Making It Work for You
You have opened the conversation and everything is going well. Now it is time to escalate. That does not mean that you should lunge in and kiss the girl. You need to get closer to her. However, do not completely lean in to talk into her ear, even if you are in a noisy club. This will break eye contact. Likely, she will then look around the room, become disengaged from the conversation and leave.
Instead, start by slowing down the conversation. Add more pauses to your speech and look at her lips more often. To close the gap, slowly walk toward her as the two of you continue to talk. Things are going very well if her speech starts to slow down and she forgets what she was going to say. You can lean in slightly to listen to her, but maintain eye contact. If you are feeling bold, put your arm around her shoulders as you talk, leaning in just enough to let your cheek touch hers. This is a subtle way to build sexual tension.
Closing: Leave Her Wanting More
If you hope to get a woman’s phone number or set up a date, then you need to close the deal. Do not mince words or over-think this. Simply say, “You seem cool. Let me get your number so we can go out for coffee some time.” Then give her your phone or a piece of paper. Another option is to find out her hobbies and set up a date to do one of those activities together right then and there. When you pick up women, it is crucial that you close properly.
The Bottom Line
Be confident when you pick up women. The recipe for this is two parts confidence and one part persistence. You may find that some women are attached, others are not interested in men and some women have other reasons for being uninterested. If things do not go your way, the most important thing for you to do is to move on. Do not obsess and do not let rejection deter you from approaching women. Want more? Read this: 9 Tricks to Confidently Pick Up Any Woman